Having a relative in hospital is obviously not a good experience. At the moment, and at least for the next few days or so my father is in. It's not good news by any stretch of the imagination, but he's not in danger. So obviously I'm happy about that, even if not about the fact he's in hospital.
For me it has brought into stark focus everyone around mes mortality. At some point everyone of us will be gone, god this is positive stuff! At the moment I wouldn't even know how to try and tell my 2 year old daughter that someone she knew so well and loved wasn't there anymore. She wouldn't understand and would doubtless become frustrated when she couldn't see them. Gracie (my daughter) has suffered loss in the exact same vein before, but she was too young to understand it. I'm not sure what her memories are of then, but I can be sure her ones of now will be far more focused and real.
To be honest, I'm not even sure how I should feel in that situation, at the moment I'm sure I wouldn't let stuff get me down and upset as that simply won't help. I'll be far more useful as something solid than as a mess. But when the actual situation occurs you never know, and to be 100% honest I'm not sure I really want to know.
But for now all that's not a worry. Onwards!
No comments:
Post a Comment