Holy can't breathe Batman!

I've done some classy things in my time, but ending up in a welfare point in Swansea being attended too by paramedics, while dressed as Batman on Saturday night, that's gotta rank up there!

Among my many medical problems I'm asthmatic, but it's not that bad any more. Therefore last Saturday when struggling for pocket space (as there weren't any) in my fancy dress costume (wallet, phone, keys etc were located in a running belt round my waist) my inhaler was due to be passed to a pocketed up friend to carry. Downside was I forgot all about that while leaving, and so it remained in my mates house while I sped down the A465.

I realised this quite quickly, but thought, "Oh well, I won't need it anyway". Ha! Wrong motherfucker!

Anyway, it was a cracking night, we were looking classy as a group, someone even dressed up as Kato (just with the wrong hat), even though he was claiming to be the Green Hornet, his hat was white and his mask black...

Look how classy we looked!

Just need to teach Robin an appropriate superhero pose!

Anyway, it got too 12:45 or so and we hit Reflex as we usually do, but by this point I'd been struggling slightly with my chest for maybe 20 minutes, and was getting increasingly aware of it. Few minutes later I went for the door to get some fresh air, was hanging round there, where one mate spotted me and came to see what the issue was (Kato), I explained the situation and was soon joined by another (Mr Incredible), before I know it the 3 of us are marching up Wind Street in search of assistance.

Thanks to the sober Kato, and my insistence nobody calls 999, we located the said van and come 1:10 I was sat on a nebuliser (it''s been a while) regaining the ability to breathe! My blood o2 dropped to below 92% and I've soreness still now from struggling to breathe for so long, plus the cold weather etc. Bradley Edwards and Kevin Marsh, I owe grand style.

From there I hit McDonalds then got the bus home, eventful evening on the whole.

The weirdest part, most people seemed to think it was quite normal for:

• Batman
• Robin
• Superman
• Captain America (although there was no shield)
• Bananaman
• The Joker
• Kato
• Mr Incredible 

To be wandering round. Odd place Swansea :)

That represented the mid-section of my birthday weekend. Previously on the Friday I'd had a particularly excellent meal in Crickhowell. 20oz rump steak was awesome, large and awesome and last night, until snow coverage scared us home we were in Britain's Got Talent auditions (not preforming) and let's be fair, it was very average, but the, surprisingly chav-heavy, crowd cheered when the production staff wanted them too etc

Anyway, I better change the bio bit to say 30!

The whole world's a stage...

I'm going to be on TV!

Yesterday, around lunch time, my phone rang... 'Blocked' it said. I thought... no... can it be? The last time that appeared on my phone it was a producer from Pointless telling me (and of course Boucheron, teams of 2) that we'd passed the audition to appear on the show.

I eagerly answered the phone, hoping.. but expecting for some fecker to try and sell my mobile insurance or something. But no, it was good news that come the end of February our presence is requested to appear on the latest series of Pointless. Where of course we will smash it...

Now I've been on TV before, I was on fifteen-to-one as a bright eye'd and slightly gormless 18 year old, and was promptly dumped out in the first round. But I went to that with zero expectations, knowing that sonme of the people on that show could hand me my arse in a quiz, and as it was a quiz, my arse was promptly handed to me.

I (possibly) was in a crowd scene in Doctor Who once (The Vote Saxon episode) and I was on the Sport Wales in the background playing dodgeball once. Great stuff.

But this time, if the subjects fall OK etc, I think there's a possibility of us doing well. Who knows! Either way you'll be able to see our humiliation, or indeed rise to power in May type time on BBC1. I won't be able to tell anyone how we've done before it goes on air, or BBC snipers will find me and slay me deadshot style.

Only downside I can see is the rather strict wardrobe requirements, 5 outfits of particular styles and colours, now I'm a simple man (not that kind of simple) and honestly I don't own 5 outfits that meet this criteria, I barely own 5 outfits, so some shopping is required.

I am picking up my fancy dress costume for Saturday nights festivities (look out Swansea a minibus of superheroes is on route...) would a Batman outfit be good for use on the show? No? Well at least I asked!

3 days left til 30...

Could the last Brit out please turn off the light

So the Australian Open is well under way, and for once there was decent representation in the singles draws for GB. 2 in the men (Murray, Ward) and 4 in the women (Watson, Robson, Keothavong and Baltacha).

By the end of the first day, all bar Murray were gone without so much as winning a set, or even getting as far as 5-5 in a set. There were still decent points in it for Robson and Ward after they came through the qualifying, plus apparently Keothavong was ill. Robson and Watson had horrible draws, but for the rest a wasted opportunity, and even those two (who won 3 games between them) could have done better.

It was a strong positive to have that many singles players in the draw, but when the majority have gone by end of day 1, what's the point? Few British players will fancy the French and then it's Wimbledon, who knows. Going well at slams is vital for image as despite them being just some tournaments out of a calender, most of the British public think tennis players only play the 4 in a year!

So then came Murray, who had an awkward draw against Ryan Harrison, who is only 19 and has the potential to be very good. A potential Tsonga match if ever there was one. Murray even began by making it a 11th British set dropped in a row, before coming through in 4. He has a strong chance this year, but I can't see him winning it.

So Brits first round: Played 6, Won 1, Lost 5, Sets won 3 Sets lost 11. Not the worst it's ever been but not pleasant reading.

At least there's more chance in the doubles. In the mens Fleming/Hutchins are seeded 15 and (J) Murray/Hanley (Who's an Aussie) are seeded 16. Plus Delgado/Marry are in there too. In the womens Keothavong is playing (if fit) with the woman who beat her in the singles and Robson is playing with an Aussie. Maybe they can win a match, maybe not.

As for the winner? Hard to look past Djokovic, plus I expect Tomic to do well... all year.

I dislike looking for cars

My car is screwed, and the repair bill to unscrewify it is most the the actual value of the vehicle, so it's uneconomical to do so, so I'm not. I've secured funding to purchase a replacement, however this means one thing...

...finding a replacement...

I dislike shopping for cars. Ideally for me, there'd just be one type in slightly different sizes, or I could have some kind of car personal shopper, but alas, my Saturday was taken up by walking round forecourts, at first with some enthusiasm, but by the end... I'd say more defeatism.

I never knew how hard finding a 1.4 diesel car was, there's not many and they're more expensive than you'd think, the recession has made these cars highly desirable and the price is going up on them. I quite liked a Ford Fusion:

Until I test drove a £3.5k (reduced) 2004 one and it was like driving a mid/late 90s Ka, with little in the way of breaks and quite basic inside, not impressed. £3,295 for a 2005 Peugot 307 SW... nice colour, size of a bus, expensive to fix, very likely to need fixing, I'll pass.

Eventually (after watching a 54 plate go for £4,300 at auction) I found, drove, liked and put a deposit on a 2003 Fiesta in a little garage in Caerphilly:

Obviously not the real one, not going to give 'the internet' my reg no.

Priced at £3,000, after the typical salesman price swapping eventually acquired for £2,500. It's nice to drive and I like it very much, also looks more goldy than the one in the picture.

One of the main reasons I dislike shopping for cars is the salesmen, they do my bastard head in. You can't just wander round and look, as soon as you step into a 1/4 mile radius of their garage, they start to hone in on you, then try some of the weirdest sales patter in the world.

Picture this, I'm in the always classy Merthyr branch of Trade Centre Wales, no Trevor didn't send me. The billboard says:

"Cars £999 to £3999"

There's no cars for £999 for a start, and there's many many over £3999. I look at a couple of fusions, priced around the £4k mark, a nice older but spec'd up mondeo and go to shuffle off, when the salesman, targets and moves in. We tell him what we're looking for and he takes us to a Nissan Note priced at a £3,999 busting £4,495.

I point out that, it destroys the budget we have and without a moments hesitation, he didn't 'speak to a manager' or 'check the paperwork' or any of the usuall bull, just went, "Well what if I can do it for £3,000?"

Didn't want or like it anyway, but you can't just drop the price by 33% on the spur of the moment. It says one thing and one alone, the original price was a rip off, designed to give the salesman some leg room or was intended to catch people out. Who knows hey, but careful anyone going there to buy!

So now my car shopping is done for a good few years, I'm a happy boy, my 'new' car will be ready this evening but I doubt I'll be able to pick it up sadly. Anyone want to give me a lift Cardiff ---> Caerphilly at 4:45 let me know lol.

 Next one'll be about tennis, there's more Brits going down in Oz today than there were at Rorke's Drift.

Nearly 30...

It's my birthday soon! (Cards are welcome, cash direct to my paypal account encouraged...)

This birthday will leave me ending with a zero, so it's a slightly bigger deal than the previous few birthdays and means I'll hit 30. As a result of the numerical magnitude, death of my youth, onset of middle age, etc, it has been decided to expand on my traditional few pints round town to visit the fair city of Abertawe, is there a theme? Of course it is... 80s cartoon characters (as I, and indeed they, were born in the 80s, see.. you follow??).

This leaves me with a dilemma, who do I go as, I've got ideas but they all feel a little obvious. Count Duckula, He Man, nothing is inspiring me at all. It has to be a male, the last twice I've ventured out on the wonderful lad of Wind Street I've been in a dress n tights... not this time! Even though it has to be said, I do have the legs to pull it off.

As well as my brick wall on ideas, I also have friends who are very good at this kind of thing, and who do put the effort in. This then pushes everyone else on to try, or else look stupid! A good effort will be made by my good self, I just don't know what yet.

What even counts? Does stuff such as Batman (yes I'm aware of the tights situation), which was a cartoon pre-80s but with some produced pre-80s too count? Ghostbusters? Bill n Ted? Cartoons, but ripped off from films? Who knows hey! The Simpsons was actually first produced in 1989, technically...

So any ideas are most welcome, I've currently got a massive 15 days til it's time so I better get my arse in gear. 

Hi, I'm Andrew and I'm an underachiever

On a personal level, my life is pretty sweet, I have good friends, the kind of friends you can rely on, I have a lovely wife who I love dearly, I have Gracie who's a story on her own, I have family, I own a couple of houses (1 of which I live in obviously). Things are good! However, there's always been one level on which I frustrate myself royally, achievements.

Now I know everything above is an achievement, and some of them big ones, I'm talking about the little personal stuff. Not quite a bucket list, I'm not that old or (as far as I'm aware) in any immediate danger of kicking said bucket.

Back in school days I had a bit of ambition, but never followed it through, up until the age of 16, I wanted to write, I had a pretty good imagination, decent attention to detail, could put points across and was borderline creative, I thought I could write things people would be interested in. I wanted to be a journalist. Come 16 and A-Level options time I convinced myself I wasn't good enough for this and went down the safe, 'I'm a geek and I'm good with numbers and computers option' (which I am) took maths/sciencey A-levels and lacked enthusiasm for 2 years. (Apart from stats modules in Maths, I seemed to be reasonably good at them naturally and enjoyed them much, looking at my job now of course...)

This lack of enthusiasm carried through so I never actually wanted to go to university, but I did for a while as that was my next prescribed step, I did ok, but circumstances went against me and I dropped. I don't regret going, some of the people there were top quality and I made some good friends, I just wish I'd been there out of desire not duty.

Work wise, I always have been ambitious, I've always tried to push myself, try and get to a more senior level, but I must have been successful in around 10% of the internal interviews I've gone for. I've got a chance to try out a senior role now, I'm giving it my best but I still feel I'm the underdog long term, but we'll see. At times I've wallowed and as a result maybe missed chances, there are times I've felt frustrated, I'm not exactly known for my unshakable self confidence and at times I can be slow to recover from losing out. This is the year for moving on up I feel, I just have to make sure it happens.

It's not so much even about the money, yes I'd love a job which paid me royally, no more stressing about money, can have all the shiny things in the world, woo-hoo, nice, but not essential. Primarily I want to enjoy my job, have a feeling of responsibility. I'm not saying I don't enjoy what I have now, but I want... more. Exactly what I've been finding in my temp role. Worst thing could be if I do my 2 months then fail long term. Previously I assumed I'd enjoy such a role, but now I actually know that I do, back to before may be worse. Oh and reasonable money is a necessity I have a family and mortgage remember, I'm sure charity work would be rewarding, but I can't see it buying food!

The writing things hangs round too, and I've written stuff before, some I've posted on here, more I haven't, most I've never finished after convincing myself (probably accurately) that what I'm writing is shite, maybe it was a good idea to start but I killed it... I stuck the one short story on amazon, but it didn't sell (I didn't exactly push it either) it was horribly bad value for money anyway, but I thought the content was tolerable. But there must be an idea in there somewhere otherwise why would I have the continuing ambition to try. Self delusion? Distinct possibility, but seeing/reading some of the stuff on the kindle store, well let's just say there's hope for everyone.

I even have been writing reviews for amazon of late, just to see how people react to stuff I think. I'm ranked just inside the top 17,000 reviewers, so not exactly a write off, but not good by any stretch. But I'll climb over time, maybe.

I've always had ambitions to be fitter, I'm never going to be an athlete, I knew from the age of 10 and missing an open goal with a header for St Illtyds Primary team I was never going to be a footballer, or an athlete of any kind. But that's no reason to sit on my arse and be a fatty now is it. I've been thin, I've been 19+ stone and if I had to choose between the two... I'd choose neither, but more towards the smaller. I really like going to the gym, and I get a sense of relaxation from running, always have, my body however disagrees and breaks regularly, slowing progress to the point where it's an effort to get going again, like now. But I will be back gym count on it, and soon (Llanelli Half coming up in March!). Plus I'm getting quite fat again, well more fat than usual!

Well fuck all this wallowing in self pity, in 16 days I'm 30 and this year I'm going to do something about some of it. That's what new years resolutions are after all. Maybe not it all, and maybe I'll bomb at what I try, but as long as I do try, I can't do any more.

Oh and I'll also try writing here regularly again, it was doing OK and I neglected it, plus that writing thing I was on about...