Train folk

Public transport is a very strange place, especially when you're in a routine and tend to be on the same service every day. I say service, I use Arriva so service isn't a word they're familiar with but stay with me.

Most people get into a real routine, myself included, I generally sit in the same place every day (on the way there, the way back is a nightmare) and more often than not, the same people sit around you. I occasionally vary and if someone, some... non regular is in my space it's no big deal. However, I have seen people with genuinely no idea what to do if they can't sit where they always do. Panic stricken looks the works. Got to love a routine!

For all intents you spend at least an hour sat round the same people, weekday in weekday out, but chances are you will have never have said a word to them. it's quite odd.

After a while you start noticing if people aren't there, even though you don't even know their name. For example, the guy who is the most conversational, with himself, on the whole train hasn't been on this week. I do find myself wondering why! Not that I'm overly gutted there's a nutter missing, but you notice these things.

It gets more... odd (for lack of a better word) when you pass one of these people out of context. By that I mean, not on the train. There's a moment of mutual recognition, as if, oh ait, I know him/her. Then a realisation... wait no I don't. By which time awkwardness has already occurred.

To be fair it's not always like that. Many months ago I left my bright white headphones (classy!) on the train, I was unaware of this until the following morning back on the arriva express. But before I could moan, whine or whinge a guy, who I recognised as detailed above popped his head round the seat, headphones in hand. Hero!

Still don't know his name though, but he is sat, at this moment in the carriage in front of me!

Train folk are also a very diverse bunch, yesterday for example a somewhat robust guy sat next to me who basically then squashed me against the wall of the train using nothing but the size of... him. Today? I have a Chinese student listening to Daft Punk songs while an older lady reads Dan Brown almost sat on his lap...

Of course all this only applies to the mornings, in the nights the shambles that is arriva crams you into the smallest space possible, then gets you home 15 mins late. Suppose the standing is good for your legs though.

What a moron!

And for once the carrot in question is me! I forgot to 'publish' this Friday so read it from the context of that day!

I stroll onto the bus this morning (Friday) brandishing the weekly 'Megarider Gold' ticket Stagecoach peddle me for more than it's worth each week. To my knowledge there's no MegaRider Silver, I think the name may just be pointless fluff to make them sound better than they are when 'Weekly' would suffice. I hold up, the same ticket I've been using all week, and the soon to retire (by the looks of him) bus driver calls me back, points out the back that the ticket expired some time ago.

Pointing it out is fine, but this old nob end decides to speak to me in a way I'd be embarrassed to speak to Gracie in. Bet he didn't consider the literally 9 hits this blog would get. Ha who's stupid now. Actually there may have been more people in the queue behind me than that...

I stand there confused, convinced that I bought it on Tuesday, but unable to deny the fact the ticket has indeed expired. With insufficient funds upon my person to get a ticket I'm forced off the bus and begin searching my stuff for the correct ticket. I was there Tuesday, I remember buying it. But the bus leaves as I head to a cashpoint to get ticket money.

Upon my return to the bus station i get a thought, an idea, just in the back of my mind. Where did I see a bus ticket? Open the front pocket of my faithful Targus backpack (with cushioned section for the very netbook that brings this blog to you) and low and behold, stoke the fucking crows, boil a bastard geordie, there is is all flat and shiny and expiring on 21/5.

Ha, fuck you old codger, told you I had one.

100th Blog Post!

So, according to my dashboard thingy, this piece of text constitutes my 100th blog post. I think it's quite safe to assume everyone guessed that from the title. It's pretty certain I've written a few more than that, including some I've discarded as being rubbish (oh yes, even worse than some of the tripe I've clicked publish on, imagine how bad they were!), I distinctly remember one I wrote in borderline anger and then deleted before I accidentally clicked said publish button, but this is number 100 that is publicly viewable and at least, and possibly at most, 4 people will read.

I'll be honest, I expected nobody on this planet to read the crap that I decided to type in, typically on dodgy public transport (bus has only hit 1 curb this morning and slammed on breaks once, good day, but then again we're only half way there) or when I couldn't sleep at some god forsaken hour in the morning. (Just hit 2nd curb, a roundabout approach too!). But it hasn't been the view free zone I expected, I'm not going to pretend I get thousands of hits, as obviously I don't, it's a personal blog and a shoddily written one at that. But I've had a couple of thousand and I'm quite happy with that! (No, that doesn't include me looking at my own, it doesn't count that).

I've used it to air a couple of short stories I've written, I have more but lack the nuts to make them public, I also have a longer one I haven't finished, but let's be real, chances are it's crap and I'm pretty damn sure it'll never see the light of day. Actually thinking about it I doubt I'll ever actually finish it, probably for the best! If anyone wants to see a story so far version... tough.

I've used it to vent opinions, I've used it to rant (usually fair enough I'm sure most people will agree, I do enjoy a good 'go-off-on-one' but someone has to wind me up first), I've used it to try n be funny. For the next 100 posts, if I get that far, chances are I'll do exactly the same.

I will publish the script, along with a link to the video of a recent presentation myself and a colleague wrote in the style of star trek, it was highly classy. It's on youtube now (Star Trek - Revenge of the Tribbles) but It'll be better all in one place I feel. I'll get a copy later.

I'll leave you with a proper blast from the past, here be a link to the first thing I ever posted. I steal from Red Dwarf, Anchorman and have a dig at facebook (setting the pattern early then). Not exactly inspiring and the 2nd post was better and I've been much funnier since... on a relative scale (3rd curb and a sharp brake). But it brought a cheesy grin back to me face for a second:

http://andrewdrisc.blogspot.com/2010/09/end.html

You stay classy Internet.